Healing

 

Here I was, having the opportunity to teach yoga in paradise, and then on my first morning I woke up with shivers and feeling odd.. Taught my class with that mindset you probably know if you are a teacher of some sort -nothing else matters, you can be focused and channel your energies to your students and when the class finishes, you just flop. I had a trip to a pharmacy ( luckily there is one nearby) and bought some paracetamol, went straight to bed and hoped it will get better. Well, the fever lasted a few days, I did my best to teach and make sure everything is fine, I had really great classes, with some experienced yogis and some beginners as well. But the weakness didn’t want to go away so I pulled myself together and went to the hospital( the public one) to get a blood test done( in case I have dengue fever which I suspected but you know, magical thinking, if you don’t think about it, it doesn’t exsist..)
The first hospital ( actually the second during my stay) experience was quiet intense, the very kind nurses and doctors to the guy who pushed me over in a wheelchair to the ward( they insisted, even though I was perfectly able to walk, there was a stamp on my documents stating wheelchair) being shocked that I am not married even though I am 35. They wanted to admit me straight away, so I tried to explain that I only came for a blood test. Finally they agreed that I can just sit and wait instead of taking bed nr 18( which was practically half a bed, every bed had two people allocated to them) .

IMG_0255 There was a point when I had a little boy on my right knee and an IV bag in my left hand, as the person accompanying my left hand neighbour had to go somewhere so she asked me to hold the IV drip for her. Made new friends:) everybody smiling and feeling that bond when you are in a similar(shitty) situation.
Finally someone took a blood sample( first one of many..) and after about 45 minutes I got the results.. and there it was, dengue fever. Even though I was feeling okay, my platelet count was low( boy, I learned too much about these little guys in the past few days:) so they still wanted to keep me there. I decided to leave to hospital against medical advice, because there were soo many people looking significantly more unwell than me waiting and they didn’t even get a bed, I couldn’t be that person.. so I signed some papers and promised to repeat the blood test the day after, rest and drink plenty of fluids. Both young doctors were extremely kind and patient.
So there I was, far away from friends and family, being slightly scared but still optimistic about everything and feeling very very grateful that the people around me only surrounded me with kindness and care and looked after me even though they only knew me for a couple of days.

IMG_0256
KK the hostel’s cat kept me company:)

Next day I decided to go to a private hospital so I won’t take up time and energy from other people who need to be treated more than me.. my numbers were even lower and the doctor warned me to take this very seriously.. so I bought spinach and beetroot ( I did my research about increasing platelet count:) and decided to stop being a hero and just let my body heal.
The human body is amazing, just thinking about billions of cells working together as an organisation to keep you alive and healthy is fascinating. And in times like this you have to just provide your body what it needs to work those healing processes. We forget about this way too often, we never take a break, never give us time, we go back to work way too early after an illness.. but in general, the body feels what it needs to heal( like when you craving certain food ) , so it is wise to just honour it ( if you can)..
Healing can be a long process( and I’m not only talking about physical one), sometimes you just need to give yourself time and be kind to yourself.


I became very frustrated initially, I am in this beautiful country, near this beautiful beach and I am spending my days in bed, doing nothing. Then I just surrendered. I will get better, and I still have time to explore everything. Baby steps..

IMG_0257I had my last visit to the “bleeding room” ( one of the funniest signs so far) and I was so pleased to learn that my blood counts are within the healthy range, I have more energy and I can slowly go back to normal( still being careful though) starting with teaching a class this evening..

 

I will be back with more stories β˜ΊοΈπŸ™πŸΌ

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